


Writing's On The Wall

by etoilecourageuse



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Azkaban, F/M, First War with Voldemort, Malfoy Manor, Second War with Voldemort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-30
Updated: 2015-12-30
Packaged: 2018-05-10 12:56:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5586265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/etoilecourageuse/pseuds/etoilecourageuse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Narcissa has always loved Malfoy Manor, but the war changes everything, even her adoration for her home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Writing's On The Wall

Narcissa had always loved Malfoy Manor. She had always adored the large, solemn building despite its darkness, despite the eerie legends her classmates had spun and whispered to her late at night in the common room, intending to frighten her after they had caught her in Lucius’ arms for the first time. But Narcissa had not been frightened, of course not… Because why should she be afraid, if she felt so comfortable in what others described as sinister?

She had always loved Malfoy Manor, even when she had been a girl still, incapable of imagining a life far away from her childhood home’s so familiar walls, had felt a strange excitement as she stepped into the entrance hall for the first time, shyly squeezing Lucius’ hand and smiling at him. Never would she forget the look upon his face… He had proposed to her that night, and it had been so difficult to suppress her tears and not lose her composure. They would become husband and wife, would seal the bond they had forged over the years and strengthen it so it would never fade, never break. How happy she had been, how beyond happy... And how beautiful she had imagined their future to be, together until the end of their lives. 

Of course she had shed tears as she had left her beloved home behind on the day of her wedding, had felt as though she were abandoning her mother who was to live alone in a manor that had become too large for her. And yet Druella Black had smiled, had smiled her beautiful smile as though it were nothing, as though she were so genuinely happy for her remaining daughter, who had vowed to visit her, that soon her doubts were forgotten. That soon only joy, only love remained. 

Her husband had ensured to make her new home comfortable for her, had been so sweet, so gentle as he knew how attached she had been to the Black Estate despite her constant asseverations that she would be as happy in Malfoy Manor. How touched Narcissa had been by his gestures, so small, so simple, and yet so important. 

“My home is where you are,” she murmured into his ear long after they had withdrawn to their bedroom into their so desired intimacy at last, her head resting on his chest as she held him, held him so tight, so close to her, never willing to let go, nearly bursting with affection for Lucius. _Her_ Lucius… 

The years had matured them but never caused their love, their passion for each other to fade, had never caused them to grow weary of one another as still her husband would look at Narcissa in the way he had looked at her on the day of their wedding, as still he would smile at her with such adoration… Even the wars, despite being tinged with darkness and fear, despite bringing them nothing but sorrow, had never done any harm to their relationship, incapable of destroying the indestructible. 

How she had worried for him, night by night, how afraid she had been to one day receive the message that never again he would come back to her, that never again she would see him… How much she had trembled each day, finding that her owl had delivered more than simply the newspaper, how she had worried... He had made a promise to be careful, never to part in disagreement and to always return, had made a promise to bid his farewell if one day he were to leave her, truly. 

Lucius had kept his vow, even when he had been pulled from her so suddenly, even when one night they had come to arrest him, to take him to Azkaban… He had looked so intensely at her, had touched her so tenderly, kissed her good-bye and even smiled, whispering into her ear not to worry for him, that soon everything would be all right. The smile had never reached his eyes, had never been truthful and Narcissa knew immediately, would be a fool to believe it to be true, but it had given her hold, at least for a moment. 

Azkaban had nearly broken them both, had torn them apart for the first time since they had laid eyes upon one another at school and nearly destroyed them, had nearly deprived Narcissa of her sanity… Of course she had visited him, had watched him slowly wither away so far beyond her reach, desperate about her own helplessness, of course she had discovered ways to distract herself during daytime, but at night… At night when she found the house to be so dark, her bedroom so silent, when she woke from a nightmare and wearily reached for him, meeting nothing but air, meeting nothing but emptiness… At night, she found his name written upon the walls, at night his voice would resound over and over within her ears… At night, she would nearly fall apart. 

Malfoy Manor had changed in the months of Lucius’ absence, had seemed to lose its beauty nearly entirely and become strange to Narcissa, eerie, as though the tales of her youth had come true at last, haunting, mocking her. 

Malfoy Manor had changed but so had she, was no longer the foolish girl she had once been, would no longer cling to her firm, despairing belief that one day everything would turn out to be all right. Perhaps it would be all right, sooner or later, perhaps they would be lucky, but how dare she assume anything but the worst? How dare she allow herself to hope when it was so dangerous, when there was no hope to be given? 

Malfoy Manor had changed… And it would never be the same again, not even after Lucius’ release, not even after the life had returned to his eyes and the memory of Azkaban seemed to fade, slowly and never fully, never truly. He had brought her relief, had given her strength with his mere presence yet the fear, the concern would never fade, yet the house would still frighten her at times. 

Perhaps it would, perhaps it would have been the same again if only they had been given the chance to recover, if only they had been given the chance to breathe… But too soon the joy had faded, too soon Lucius had been made a prisoner once more, too soon they both had been deprived of their freedom within their own home as the Dark Lord had intruded so violently, acquiring what was not his to acquire to punish them for their disgrace, to humiliate, to torture them… 

Narcissa had been so afraid each night as she prepared for bed, scarcely capable of keeping her hands from trembling, afraid that they would not wake in the morrow, afraid that she would open her eyes to find her husband gone once more, that… 

But no. They had survived; day by day and night by night they had survived, together, and yet slowly died inside. No… No! They had survived, the war had ended and they had survived, survived only because of one another… They had survived. 

Malfoy Manor had changed; their home they had once so adored was no longer their home, was a strange place now, cold and haunting, full of shadows that would never again release them. How happy they had been here once, how safe they had felt… But those times were long gone, what had happened within these walls could not be forgotten, could not be undone. But even if they had lost the house they had once so adored, they would always have each other, would not care whether they lost anything they possessed if only they were to remain together. Because only together they were capable of living, of surviving; only together they were at home, truly.


End file.
